Thanks for dropping by, your advice is true. Alas, i must confess that unfortunately there are men out there who have wonderful wives but want to taste many women and will always be looking for opportunity.

Be kind to him.

No, seriously. Men who stray from the marriage bed are looking for the one thing that a wife typically forgets to provide:

Kindess and support.

Some women might make the mistake of mothering her husband- even if she doesn’t nag him, she may emasculate him. Others make the mistake of spending so much time obsessing over remaining beautiful or becoming beautiful in order to keep her husband that she forgets that she IS beautiful to him, or he wouldn’t have married her to begin with.

Never try to become a wife, if your intention is to be a mistress. If you intend to steal a married man away and marry him yourself- you will find yourself alone and as bitter as his first wife.

But if you want him for a good time, for as long as you’re attracted to him? Take a deep breath, make direct eye contact and smile at him.

That’s truly all it takes. Married men who cheat are SO starved for love that they are easily tempted by pure kindness and that puppy love they remember vaguely from before they got married.

Sex isn’t the issue- men can masturbate, and married men who are bored but remain faithful aren’t tempted because sex isn’t the important thing.

LOVE is.

(And you, wifies… take that message to heart and remember to cherish your husbands- or someone else will.)

To say that you are playing with fire is an understatement, just go visit of a few of the myriad of infidelity related websites and read the messages of devastation that affairs have caused. As a survivor of an affair that my ex-W had, I can tell you, that aside the death of a love one, it is the most gut wrenching experience a human being can go through. It devastates ALL parties involved (the betrayed, the cheater and most of all the innocent children).

If you truly care about your marriage and your family, then please change pediatricians ASAP and talk to your H about this nearby-miss experience. It is safe to say that despite your claims of him being your best friend, he is totally oblivious to this situation. Even if there is no improvement in the sexual intimacy department of your marriage, there is the possibility that an ‘agreement’ could be reached by the two of you to have your sexual needs be discreetly met without resorting to lies and deceit which are what ultimately destroy a marriage.

I’ve since remarried and have forgiven my ex-W for her betrayal (for my benefit and those of our kids, not hers). I will leave you and pray that you take my advice. Take care.

P.S. A year after my divorce became finalized, I received an e-mail from my ex-W basically stating that she regreted not coming to me to talk and to try to resolve the issues in our marriage before she chose to have her affair. In her words “If I had, there is a good chance that we might still be married, growing old together and seeing our children grow up with both parents in love with one another”.