Something which makes me cringe is when I see young girls or even grown women chasing the opposite sex. (Not to say that I haven’t been guilty of this behaviour myself!)
In all my years of observing men and women I’ve noticed that men need to be the pursuers. I Know this concept seems so old fashioned as we are living in a liberated age, we as women have voting rights, earn money and pretty much get to do what we want – well at least here in the west.
My observations have led me to believe that men are hunters and when women lay down at their feet they’ll just toy with them. Much like a cat with her killed mouse – throwing it up in the air and then walking away to never look at the thing again.
Now I know that men can be shy, which doesn’t surprise me – they’ve been told not to come across as a pervert. So it can make communication difficult. And yes I know you have the right to like a man and to even to pursue him. But how will you feel if he rejects you?
My main reason for being hard to get is firstly to protect yourself from rejection and secondly if he’s into you he won’t just give up like that. Obviously show that you’re interested. Flirt with him, enjoy the converstaion but don’t hope and expect that now you’ll be married for ever. Cause chances are he won’t ask you for your phone number or if he does he might not call you. He may call you and even go out with you and you’ll be feeling over the moon and then he may never call you again.
Don’t make excuses as to why he never called you – it’s not like he’s too busy or lost your number – he’s just not that into you. Accept it and move on. Don’t call with a lame excuse you just look silly in his eyes and are making your self vulnerable for feeling hurt.
In fact in my observations I’ve even noticed that in long standing happy relatonships the men were the pursuers of the woman. And even after x amount of years the woman is not a doormat and the man still is chasing her in a more subtle way. It’s not game playing – it’s just the way we as humans seem to be wired.
So my advice is play hard to get.
how can you make your partner to be more open to you and talk about sex. we’ve not have sex for 7 months and the reason he gave is that we fight a lot and that disturb him psychologically and he can’t think straight and with men is all up in the mind. how true is this? please help
Dear Tshidi,
You can wait for a quiet moment and then talk about your relationship. Sex does happen in the mind and too often it is wrongly believed that men just want sex. Men also have feelings and when they are stressed they are not able to perform sexually. If you have been fighting a lot then I would try to find out what you are fighting about and see if you can reconcile.
Thanks for visiting my website.
Thanks Admin for your response.
We forever fighting about quality time. he works till late during the week,and on saturdays he sometimes works but he wont come home straight,he’ll rather go see his friends afterwards and come home late again. sundays, he woke up have breakfast sometimes, and off he goes, he’ll only come home after 9pm.everytime i start talking about this, he freaks…there wont be communication for days up until i talk to him, otherwise he prefers to keep quiet.how do i get him to talk to me if i’m the one who’s wrong?
[...] I think he should pursue you and not the other way round. Hard to Get | How to Seduce a Man [...]